905.683.7228    support@integrate-health.ca

The “Why” Behind My Child’s Behaviour

The “Why” Behind My Child’s Behaviour
Written by Integrate Health Team
Sun Jul 14 2024

WHY DOES HE DO THAT? This is the question many of us ask when we observe a child having a tantrum in public. We have been trained to employ others to simply “handle their kid better” instead of trying to understand why it is that behaviour came to be.

I remember one instance when I was waiting patiently for my dentist to call me into the room for my cleaning, when a father came into the office with his son and daughter. He sat them on their own chairs and instructed that they “cooperate” until it was their turn to see the dentist. The son, who was about two-years-old sat happily on his chair playing with a squishy toy he had carried in. His older sister, however, stated: “I’m bored. Can I play with your iPhone Daddy?” The dad replied that he had left the phone in the car and that she could find a book to read from a small table in the corner instead. The daughter was not having it and proceeded to cry and yell: “I want the iPhone!” at the top of her lungs. The dad ignored her and continued to play with his son. The other people in the office directed frowns of disapproval at the dad, as if to communicate: “Wow! You should go get her that phone so she shuts up!” I, on the other hand, shot the dad a thumbs up for sticking to his guns! In my opinion, he was not giving into his daughter’s wants, not because he’s a bad parent, but rather was performing an intervention. Perhaps she was tired or maybe did not get to play with the iPhone in the car so she was hoping that she would be allowed to while waiting in the dentist’s office, since this is what she usually does. There could be a million reasons behind this behaviour, but I didn’t know the circumstances, nor did anyone else in the room. The dad knew how to handle it and after a few minutes of crying and whining she stopped.

When it comes to behaviour, there is always a reason WHY it is occurring. In Applied Behaviour Analysis (ABA), this reason is what we call the FUNCTION that is maintaining the behaviour. There are four main functions of behaviour. These include: attention, access to an object or activity, escape or avoidance, and sensory stimulation. An example of a behaviour being maintained by access to an object is when a child screams and cries in the grocery store because he wants a chocolate bar. If the parent provides the chocolate, the child is more likely to continue to scream and cry the next time to receive chocolate because that has previously been effective. Sometimes, this function can be difficult to decipher. However, if we are not aware of why a problem behaviour is occurring, then how can we cause it to decrease or even go away completely?

As Behaviour Analysts, a lot of work can go into deciphering the function of a person’s behaviour. However, there are things that you can do to help this process.

  • Begin to notice and track (if possible) the context in which the behaviour tends to occur, including what happens before the behaviour. For instance, it only happens when playing with siblings.
  • Consider what happens directly after the behaviour. Perhaps, it is ignored or redirected.
  • Think of any setting events that might be impacting the behaviour, such as the behaviour tends to occur when your child is tired or hungry. All of these elements can help to assess why the behaviour is occurring and how we can stop it.

If you would like more information on managing problem behaviours, please contact Integrate Health Services for more information about our Behaviour Consultation and Applied Behaviour Management program and how we can help your child!

Applied Behaviour Management is a therapy commonly utilized to support children diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders as well as a number of other disorders including: Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Anxiety Disorders, Oppositional Defiance, Disorder (ODD), Down Syndrome, Learning Disorders/Intellectual Disorders, Brain Injuries, Developmental Delays, Tourette's Disorder.


Check out the categories for our older posts!